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Funny Tweets

Mom: "Are you going with me to the store?" Me: "No I'm tired." Mom: "I'll buy you something" Me: "Yeah ill be ready in a minute"

https://twitter.com/iQuoteComedy

5 years ago

Lotus F1 Team

RT to win this very unique grid pass from Tom Jones in Singapore. Winner will be selected at random #F1 #LotusF1Team http://t.co/hgc1NFSMyV

https://twitter.com/Lotus_F1Team

4 years ago

Common White Girl

*asks mom if she can buy something for me in september* "no christmas is coming"

https://twitter.com/girlposts

5 years ago

The Next Web

SimilarWeb PRO lets you dig deeper on competitors’ Web traffic data http://t.co/dIvTazY5Qb by @psawers

https://twitter.com/TheNextWeb

4 years ago

♚Sophomores♚

things i haven't learned in high school: how to: pay bills buy a house apply for college but thank god i can graph standard form

https://twitter.com/ClassOf2016

5 years ago

anthony

Women's logic: I went to buy a dress. But I saw a beautiful pair of shoes. So I bought this handbag.

https://twitter.com/iSpeakComedy

5 years ago

Sagittarius™

When #Sagittarius have money, They have nothing to buy. When they don't have money, they want everything.

https://twitter.com/WeSagittarius

4 years ago